Vox Satriani "Satchurator" Distortion

If you're thinking I'm going to ask questions about the sound of this thing or it's circuit in any way, you is wrong-o.  I'm going to rant... ready?

So I get these never ending pointless Musicians Friend catalogues, which never have anything new in them, yet I always look when I'm having my alone time in the bathroom.  This time I noticed a new(er) product.  The Joe Satriani "Satchurator" Distortion by Vox, which I find totally uninteresting, but it's the description that got my attention.

"Designed to Satriani's exact specifications.  Provides vintage to modern distortion sounds.  Preservess the guitars high end when the volume is rolled off.  Responds to pick attack.  Red metallic finish"

So the guy that wrote this expects me to believe that Joe Satriani sat down with an Electrical Engineer and went over the circuit design so as to have it be his "exact specification"? I'm sure he did exactly that.
Moving on.
I also didn't realize that the fundamental character of what constitutes distortion has changed from whatever time frame is considered "vintage" up until now.  You know me, I really like using the NEW distortion as opposed to the OLD distortion.  It just sounds better.

I got no issues with the rest of it, but it's ridiculous marketing and misleading as hell grammar that makes stuff like this totally unbuyable to people like me, and further more it makes me look at the guy in the marketing department that wrote this erroneuos piece of trash as a total asshole.

Here's how it went down.

*ring* * ring* (that's the telephone)
Joe's Agent:
"hey Joe, Vox wants to pay you 10,000$ to put your name on a pedal"

Joe:
"Is it a Tube Screamer clone?  I really like the tube screamer."

Joe's Agent:
"What's a tube screamer?"

Joe:
"Just have them send me a picture of it so my name isn't on something with pink dicks all over it.  That's Peter North's territory"

Joe's Agent:
"Who?"

*click* (that's the phone hanging up)

I saw an article where they had 4 different colored prototypes
he was trying out as they stood around so i don't think he needs
the money enough to just say whatever BUT

I would think it is just a tweaked tube screamer with the fulltone
idea of an extra pot in the feedback loop for and added oberdrive
setting .  there's a few mods that help & make sense for the
tube screamers , you know less gain / more gain , less bite /more
more low end / less ..........there is  Joe's " inovative " Pad !

more like Hey joe like this one  ? what about this one
what do you think ? Ahhhhhh it's sounds like Vai , better change it

if they have to use red metalic finnish as a feature , yep can't
be too much new , Vintage in this case more likely means
" how they've aways done it " modern , well have you heard the latest
Death,punk,we'd like a deal even thought we pretend we don't care Metal ?

haha
there's too much vai in it!

I have done some tech work for Vai.  He has his name on a distortion pedal and I  from what I saw, He had a very good ear when it came to the design of said distortion pedal. I am sure joe did the same thing, used his ear and made comments of what he thinks it should sound like. Then that data was taken to a design team and they tried to prototype what he was talking about. Then there was most likely a back and forth for a bit till the found something that is easy to produce yet sounds good... At vai's home studio he has boxes of prototyped pedals of his distortion pedal that are in various stages of what the final one was/is. But that is just a guess.

sodderboy:
Hi, I'm sodderboy.  Please ask Josh to rant more often.

Josh's agent:
Who is sodderboy?

*click*

Vai is talented , quirky for taste but he has a voice , which is waay more than
you can say about the kids these days .
There is really only so much you can do with a distortion pedal ,
but tailoring it to your style , i can dig that .
I've read where he has other guys modded pedals and some of those
i've taken apart to find no magic [ replacing the 1 uf caps with poly film
usually makes em sound better /bigger  ]
I also recall Vai talking about his trick of adding 10db at 60hz on a.p.i's
to Gtr's , now he has a sense of humor but if you listen to the
carlton / Lukather live cd [ i think he mixed it ? ] i'd believe that

Ah the  / a new trend  , celebrity designer overdrive boxes
low pricepoint compared to an amp , collect all your faves !

josh said:

Joe:
"Just have them send me a picture of it so my name isn't on something with pink dicks all over it.  That's Peter North's territory"

Click to expand...

If there were 25 hours in they day, I would have just wasted one whipping a photoshoped picture of that one.  Too funny.

who or what is peter north?

Pucho,
His nickname is Peter "2 quart" North, if that gives you any ideas.

If there was a pill I could take that would allow me to approach the sheer volume of fluids that man can produce, man oh man.  And you think the amount of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere is creating environmental issues.  How on earth would the EPA react to this situation?

"This just in.  Due to the increase in size of the seminal vesical produced by the new drug "Exxtrema", the EPA has filed a federal injunction to shut down production at the Exxtrema's parent company "Maxxema's" North Michigan production facility.  This injunction is based largely on complaints from the state's waste water treatment facility.  Their filtering systems are not setup to handle either the high volumes being as well as the high viscosity of this material.  The water treatment plants are seeking additional funding to install higher capacity filters, but that could take several months because the State will have to examine the claims via specialized focus groups. 
Until then, the EPA is taking on a more non-traditional approach to this problem by sending representatives out to area High Schools in an attempt to discourage the abuse of the Exxtrema pills, and possibly the release of these fluids somewhere other than the bathroom to keep these materials out of the water.  A representative for the EPA was not available for comment, so we will have to report back on the specifics of this controversial program.

Id like to know if Cold play thinks it sounds authentic....

pucho812 said:

who or what is peter north?

Click to expand...

are you serious?

who is cold play, anyway?
;D

sound is much too overrated

Today, I went home to take a dump after lunch.  (When you live a mile and a half from work, your own toilet is a feasible option when deciding a locale for excrement export.)  Anywho, when I walked up to the front door, I grabbed the mail and went in.  I got the new Musician's Friend in the mail.  So I took it on a field trip to the bathroom.  I flipped through the first quarter of it and was angered by sheer BS that was being shown to me.  I think the Snatchurator was what put me over the edge.  (not too far because I didn't want to miss the water)  Musician's Friend and Guitar Center are like the Clear Channel of gear.  The only products to be featured are pushed by marketing Juggernauts.  Companies that outspend Coca Cola to market a guitar pedal with some metal dickface's name on it. 

Don't get me wrong.  I like some products by gigantic companies.  I like metal, too.  Hell, Clear Channel stations play a couple good bands.  But most people aren't exposed to any variety, because Banjo Center and Clear Channel have driven the small guys out of business. 

BTW!  Fender Road Worn guitars???  $950 for a beat up Mexican Strat or Tele?  Are you high?  How about I drop $950 on a used U.S. Vintage Fender that will be worth the same amount tomorrow.  Still, suckers live for that crap.  There's one born every minute. 

Yeah , it's a modified fulltone modified Tube screamer
with Joe's blessing & endoresment ,
probably sounds o.k.
Modified fulltone modified tubescreamers usually do

They sure are pushing it hard , but strike while the irons hot
and it's flavor of the month , once the mystic wears off ,
its time to look for a new pedal  [ c'mon you can keep up ! ]
and someone will have one to sell