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boji said:
My internet semi-stranger advice would be to find a therapist/counselor that you believe to be much smarter than you

Agree. This often central for being able to see new aspects or reinterpret existing beliefs about yourself.

/Jakob E.
 
boji said:
My internet semi-stranger advice would be to find a therapist/counselor that you believe to be much smarter than you

gyraf said:
Agree. This often central for being able to see new aspects or reinterpret existing beliefs about yourself.

I also agree with Boji and Gyraf,
I truly believe that it's not only great advice but that it's the best advice.

I wish all good to you mate
 
Let me ask you guys this, If I told you I am gay instead of an abstinent (and straight btw) guy, would you advice me the same thing you just did? to find a psychiatrist? would you call me "abnormal", "un-natural", and couldn't possibly believe that I am ok and happy?

This is the thing, today you can probably do anything (as long as its legal), you can f**k a goat, you just have to say "I identify myself as a goat" and people will aplaude you and tell you how brave you are, people don't care who or what you are f**king (again, if its legal), all they care about is that you are f**king, but if you are not f**king AND you are religious, there is something really wrong with you, people feel sorry for yourself and tell you things like "honestly you just need to get laid", seriously? I could have told you I only f**k hookers and you would've consider that normal.

Whoops would you tell a gay guy "You just really need to get laid with a woman"? that is your advice?

When people say homosexuals were born that way, many accept it, why not accept that I was also born this way?

Are you listening to yourselves? dont be hipocrites.

Now, now, to be fair, I know that many of you are talking out of the goodness of your hearts and I appreciate that, I know many of you, not all of you personally, but enough to form somekind of opinion on who you are and how you are like, and really believe most of you are good guys, that is why I was (naively) confident on posting what I initially posted  (which apparently only one guy read the entire post). The thing is that you guys think you are trying to help me, and I appreciate that, but you are discarding my opinions, you have already decided Im am a f**ked up dude who needs help regardless of what I say, and that at is something I do not appreciate.

Another thing, regarding religion, I am not trying to evangelize anyone, I know how uncomfortable it is when some stranger calls me on the phone or rings at my door and tells me "I want to talk to you about the bible or Jesus Christ and the sacrifice he made for you", I AM RELIGIOUS and I know what It feels like when I am in those situations, trust me, I know its uncomfortable, I am not doing that here, I am just saying what I believe, I am basically taking the risk of telling you guys my deepest, well not deepest, but some of my personal beliefs, and for some of you to tell me "I lost you when you started talking about religion" to me it sounds like a narrow minded approach, I talked about religion, first, because I thought it was relevant to tell you I was at some point considering becoming a catholic monk, and that one of my goals in life is to get in touch with the lord. Thats all I said, I didn't quote passages from the bible, I didn't ask you to believe in my religion, anything, I was just giving you my background. Not only was I judged for  that, I was basically called crazy, discarded religion as a way to "help me out" even when I do not believe I need help.

So you guys look at it from an outside perspective and think I am weird, what about asking me more questions before forming your own opinion? All you said was "seek psychiatric help and good luck with your life", I know the internet is not the best way and you don't probably care, but hell, this is the brewery! as JR said, anything goes!, you just didn't like what I was saying and many don't even bothered to read my entire opening post, I am aware it was long. But you didn't even ask me, why wont you want to get laid? , why do you think that? why don't you want to date?, hell, no one asked what happened to you to make that decision? those are some basic questions! I could have given you philosophical, personal, mathematical, statistical, medical and legal reasons, I would probably wouldn't even mention religion, but no, you just assumed everything and said: this guy is f**ked up.

And that people, is whats really f**ked up with the world these days, social judgment, opinion is more important than truth, guilty until proven otherwise, guilty by opinion or statements, not by facts. Don't even bother to hear the other side of the story.
 
user 37518 said:
Whoops would you tell a gay guy "You just really need to get laid with a woman"? that is your advice?

This will be my last reply, and just because you directed questions towards me.

My advise was directed to a specific person that wrote a long post (now deleted) and was related to what that person described, in this case you.
You asked for Groupdiy forum members opinions, and I gave my opinion based on that.
It's not fair that you come back and shot the people because they gave opinions that were not what you expected or wanted to hear.
A few people expressed the advice that you should seek a Therapist, so I was not the only one.

What I would tell to a Gay person, if that specific person had a problem and asked my opinion, would be my advise based on that person specific problems, but what I wrote is only specific to you and what you presented.
You deleted your first post and edited some of the following ones so it doesn't make any sense now to bring what I or other people commented  regarding that first post, it doesn't make any sense at all, and it's just confusing for someone that might read this thread.


user 37518 said:
Are you listening to yourselves? dont be hipocrites.

Unfortunately your are the one that is not listening himself,
and I hope that you can read all what you wrote sometime with another frame of mind and understand the signs.

A lot of stuff that you wrote you probably already realised you were not well because you edited and deleted those parts, I remember you said "I hate Children" and something along the lines "I know that I don't follow the normal distribution, I'm not average, I on the boundaries" , something like this, but that was edited and deleted now by you.
It would be nice that you never deleted that and could read it all some day when you're calmer.


user 37518 said:
, and for some of you to tell me "I lost you when you started talking about religion" to me it sounds like a narrow minded approach,

Again you are quoting replies to a first post that you already deleted, so it's not fair at this point.

No one here was disrespectful to you because you said you are a religious (catholic) person and
no one questioned your religious beliefs.
Everyone was respectful to you.

But if you write in an internet forum and ask people opinions, other people have the right to read or not read what they want, and some topics inside a conversation will be more interesting to people that others.
I have no personal interest at all in engaging into religious conversations and I will be vocal about that as you are vocal about being a religious person, so I wish you respect me like I respected you.

You said in a previous post, that you edited and deleted now, that your friends were worried about you and told you that there's something wrong with you, let me tell you those are really good friends. Only a good friend has courage to tell us the truth even knowing that it's not something we want to hear.
You have good friends and should follow their advice also.
Also the people here that expressed their opinions and advised therapy are also really good people, myself included, and want the best for you.


As your posts were deleted or edited this thread is starting to not make much sense at all,
I will not come here, read or comment any more.

I honestly wish you all the best in life


(this post was only edited to correct spelling mistakes as I'm not a native English speaker)
 
Whoops said:
This will be my last reply, and just because you directed questions towards me.

My advise was directed to a specific person that wrote a long post (now deleted) and was related to what that person described, in this case you.
You asked for Groupdiy forum members opinions, and I gave my opinion based on that.
It's not fair that you come back and shot the people because they gave opinions that were not what you expected or wanted to hear.
A few people expressed the advice that you should seek a Therapist, so I was not the only one.

What I would tell to a Gay person, if that specific person had a problem and asked my opinion, would be my advise based on that person specific problems, but what I wrote is only specific to you and what you presented.
You deleted your first post and edited some of the following ones so it doesn't make any sense now to bring what I or other people commented  regarding that first post, it doesn't make any sense at all, and it's just confusing for someone that might read this thread.


Unfortunately your are the one that is not listening himself,
and I hope that you can read all what you wrote sometime with another frame of mind and understand the signs.

A lot of stuff that you wrote you probably already realised you were not well because you edited and deleted those parts, I remember you said "I hate Children" and something along the lines "I know that I don't follow the normal distribution, I'm not average, I on the boundaries" , something like this, but that was edited and deleted now by you.
It would be nice that you never deleted that and could read it all in some days when you're calmer.


Again you are quoting replies to a first post that you already deleted, so it's not fair at this point.

No one here was disrespectful to you because you said you are a religious (catholic) person and
no one questioned your religious beliefs.
Everyone was respectful to you.

But if you write in an internet forum and ask people opinions, other people have the right to read or not read what they want, and some topics inside a conversation will be more interesting to people that others.
I have no personal interest at all in engaging into religious conversations and I will be vocal about that as you are vocal about being a religious person, so I wish you respect me like I respected you.

You said in a previous post, that I you edited and deleted now, that your friends were worried about you and told you that there's something wrong with you, let me tell you those are really good friends. Only a good friend has courage to tell us the truth even knowing that it's not something we want to hear.
You have good friends and should follow their advice also.
Also the people here that expressed their opinions and advised therapy are also really good people, myself included, and what the best for you.


As your posts were deleted or edited this thread is starting to not make much sense at all,
I will not come here, read or comment any more.

I honestly wish you all the best in life

Whoops, the only reason I deleted the posts I made is because I though I was oversharing and then realized I didn't think it would contribute anything relevant, plus, I wrote those posts in a moment of "passion" lets call it and then I felt I didn't want to leave such personal info of my self for posterity in the internet. When I made my first post I was asking for your opinions on the MGTOW movement, not with my life decisions, you guys instead made it about myself, I said I just found about this thing called MGTOW 2 weeks ago, and I've been living like this for 9 years without even knowing it, you were the ones who thought my post was a cry for help.

To justify the MGTOW movement I told a story about the Jeff Bezos divorce settlement and my opinions, which is basically one of the most evident examples of why MGTOW was founded in the first place. The thread is called MGTOW, not, Help me with my life decisions, I wanted to know what you guys think about MGTOW, and perhaps I overshared about my life, that was my mistake. Why did I delete my first post? I realized no one read it completely or perhaps no one was interested, I realized that what people read were the first 3 paragraphs in which I talked about my life, stopped reading, and gave me advice on how to live my life or that I needed help. You yourself admitted that you didn't pass beyond the religion part of my post, which was only a very very brief part of my post, so you yourself even didn't read the whole post, that is what I figured out and said to myself "f**k it" I'll just delete the thing.

I never said anyone was disrespectful, in fact the opposite, everyone has been really respectful, what I complained about is that I was basically stereotyped and taken out of context, perhaps out of good will from your side, but stereotyped anyway...

Again, I was asking your opinion on the MGTOW movement, not myself, you were the guys who thought I was asking your opinion on my life, only boji was the one who commented on the MGTOW movement, the rest just commented on how fucked up I am.
 
I finally did a search to find out what a MGTOW movement is.... ("Men going their own way".... with sundry slightly different explanations of what that means.)

I thought that was just being a bachelor or single.

JR
 
JohnRoberts said:
I thought that was just being a bachelor or single.

JR

Exactly, that's what I thought aswell for 9 years, apparently its a "thing" now, its being a bachellor but they now have some sort of ideology behind it.
 
I wouldn't expect any such movement to be self sustaining.

There was a religious movement that advocated celibacy (Shakers). For some reason they died out... 8)

JR
 
JohnRoberts said:
I wouldn't expect any such movement to be self sustaining.

There was a religious movement that advocated celibacy (Shakers). For some reason they died out... 8)

JR

They technically have two remaining members  ;D

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/there-are-only-two-shakers-left-world-180961701/
 
Reminds me of the religion of Jains. They aspire towards such perfect states of nonviolence, that to breathe is to harm microbes.

I heard it said the most trandecent learn to die of starvation by refusing to kill any plant life.
(don't ask me about the moral quandary of what dying means for all their symbiotic gut bacteria)
 
The Shakers are buried deep in the American character. A stew of hedonism and Puritan. They were celibate but worked themselves into religious fervors like Charismatic Christians. Through the severe lifestyle they left beautiful objects and an aesthetic that still influences.
 
The thing with MGTOW is that first, they are not a religious movement, second, they don't even promote celibacy, they say: you can date, you can have sex but no long term relationships, no cohabitation and definitely not marriage, its only the more extreme MGTOW the ones that avoid dating and are celibate. If you make a youtube search for MGTOW, you'll notice something quite interesting, mostly from women videos, some of them are just pissed, calling  MGTOW antifeminist, MGTOW are not the anti-feminist, they just don't give a f**k about women, the anti feminists are the MRA (Men Rights Activists), those guys will rally up, and all that crap, MGTOW is more a philosophy and its basically based on internet forums rather than a mainstream movement, however, women seem to despise MGTOW more than they do the MRA, my thoughts (and this is IMHO), is that they prefer to be hated than being ignored.

The other women talking about MGTOW, rather than being pissed are worried, and basically taking the men's side, they are saying things like "ladies, this is a problem, we are f**king up, and men are just not playing anymore.", several women are like this, do a search for Diana Davison, there are many.

All I am saying is that things are changing folks and we don't know the long term repercussions of this, for all of you old fashioned folks out there, I invite you to try Tinder or online dating, specially if you are under 6 foot tall, don't make a 6 figure income and you do not look like Brad Pitt, An ideal man for this experiment is a guy in his 40s or 50s, not particularly good looking, not a CEO of a great company, not great income, under 6 foot, and make sure to include in your profile info "looking for a good woman who will love me for who I am" let us know about your results.
 
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