Mark E smith gets a pass... For being a bug-eyed monstrosity who is so unspeakably weird that he's actually fabulous.
However, rather than retell the slightly tedious tale of how Mister Ginger-top (the pictures of him and Alex Ferguson being tormented at Old Trafford FILLED me with Schadenfreude!) mistreated me and a very good friend on separate occasions, I think I'll relate the story of the assistant engineer at one of the 'Island' residential studios back in the 80's. Might have been Compass Point studios in Nassau, or could have been Air Monserrat... Both studios are now closed, but both gave us some great recordings... Anyhow, whichever it was, let the tale begin:
Simply Red had booked in for a few weeks, to record and mix an album. From the start, the assistant was on the receiving end of some of the most lovely displays of the ginger-locked âs$hole's fabled personality. A few days in, he was sacked. Not for anything reasonable I believe, just to assert "alpha-dog" status.
So the album progresses, and eventually is finished. They have a "wrap party" and the original assistant appears, bearing a beautiful gift of a splendidly-decorated cake, by way of an "all is forgiven, and congratulations" offering. -Mister Hucknell is suitably magnanimous, and everyone starts drinking and eating. -The largest slice of cake is served to the carrot-topped fûckwit.
...
What nobody (other than the assistant) knew, is that there were TWO cakes. Both were chocolate, and similarly frosted and decorated...
...But the one which was served to the bionic fûcktard was made with a triple-helping of chocolate-flavored Ex-Lax.
Revenge -in this case- was a dish served at room temperature.
