Funny story for my friends from the U.S.

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user 37518

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So here it goes, first of all I am middle class mexican, I was born in Mexico City and have lived in Mexico my entire life (except for a 6 month period whilst doing my masters when I lived for 6 months in Ohio, legally in case you were wondering), back in the 90s it was very popular for mexicans to go to the US to do some shopping during the hollidays, nowadays it is less appealing because we have Amazon, eBay, and all that, so no need to go all the way there.

Anyway, I was with my parents in the US, they rented a car, can't remember exactly which city, we used to go a lot to Laredo and McAllen, Las vegas, and so on, mostly the south, my parents wanted to go to JCPenny's, but they couldn't find the store, so my parents saw these 3 black guys walking by and my dad stopped and told my mom to ask them were the store was, and my mom who cant speak a damn word of english said to the black dudes "Excuse me, where is the pennys shop?" she obviously meant JCPenny's, the three black guys looked at her like WTF and said "the what?" and she repeated "the pennys shop", the guys started laughing and I was very young so I just said "We are from Mexico" and somehow they figured out that she meant JCPenny's and gave us directions.

Everytime I remember that story I cant help laughing my ass off, and I wanted to share it with you guys.

 
Oyes vato, if you were in McAllen TX, you were near where I was born and grew up.  Spent  my growing up years near the rio grande. It's an interesting place down there, such a blend of  both sides of the river, such a blend of language and culture. 
 
Remind me to share my funny stories about my several visits in Mexico (mostly work related).

One night in TJ was memorable (the strip clubs in San Diego wouldn't let us in, said we were too drunk).

Even that was work related (cough). A large Peavey dealer from San Diego invited me and my sales rep to attend a private party in one of their stores.

JR 
 
pucho812 said:
Oyes vato, if you were in McAllen TX, you were near where I was born and grew up.  Spent  my growing up years near the rio grande. It's an interesting place down there, such a blend of  both sides of the river, such a blend of language and culture.

To be honest, most of the time we didn't have to speak english  ;D ;D ;D we were looked in a funny way thou because me and my family are all white, and I mean very white. This is a true story, I think it was in Vegas, I saw some guy speaking in spanish to one of his employees, so I just approached him and asked him were the bathroom was, in spanish, the guy was so shocked to hear me speak spanish and started making a conversation with me, I think he was completely impressed because he ended up giving me and my family free lunch cards, he was the manager at the McDonalds.
 
JohnRoberts said:
Remind me to share my funny stories about my several visits in Mexico (mostly work related).

One night in TJ was memorable (the strip clubs in San Diego wouldn't let us in, said we were too drunk).

Even that was work related (cough). A large Peavey dealer from San Diego invited me and my sales rep to attend a private party in one of their stores.

JR

Would love to hear them John, haven't been to TJ myself buy "I've heard stuff"
 
user 37518 said:
To be honest, most of the time we didn't have to speak english  ;D ;D ;D we were looked in a funny way thou because me and my family are all white, and I mean very white. This is a true story, I think it was in Vegas, I saw some guy speaking in spanish to one of his employees, so I just approached him and asked him were the bathroom was, in spanish, the guy was so shocked to hear me speak spanish and started making a conversation with me, I think he was completely impressed because he ended up giving me and my family free lunch cards, he was the manager at the McDonalds.

I get that too. My dad is Italian my mom Mexican. Both sides diluted over time, I often get confused for being Jewish. So  when I bust out the Spanish and it’s pronounced well, the looks I get are funny.  Even funnier my neighbor growing up was as white as they come.  No latin/Hispanic in the family tree, would turn red in the sun, family tree puro Europe, and the dude speaks Spanish better then most Mexicanos who live down there.  It’s a trip.

 
user 37518 said:
Would love to hear them John, haven't been to TJ myself buy "I've heard stuff"
Just a few high lights. TJ is the stereotypical "anything goes" kind of place. A place where you can buy prescription drugs without the prescription, etc. 

-I vaguely recall lying on my back on a small stage while a stripper was dancing on my face... my friends thought it would be amusing to tie my shoelaces together. I figured out what they were doing down there so disappointed them by not falling, after the dance ended.

- I had a return flight out of LAX early the next morning so no rest for the weary that night. I recall keeping track of the hour and declaring when it was time to head "el norte". We still had to check out of our unused motel room in San Diego.

- My sales rep who was supposed to be driving me around was too wasted to drive, so I ended up driving us from San Diego to LAX on the 405 using the road reflectors to stay in my lane, driving by braille... remarkably I made my flight.

JR

PS; I had classier visits elsewhere in Mexico like Mexico City, Monterrey, and a several day long dealer meeting put on by our distributor inside a fenced resort in central Mexico. The classic Mexican dishes served at one private party were nothing like the Tex-Mex fast food that Americans ASSume is the extent of Mexican fare.
 
JohnRoberts said:
Just a few high lights. TJ is the stereotypical "anything goes" kind of place. A place where you can buy prescription drugs without the prescription, etc. 
Agreed, it used to be like that some decades ago, today it has become a lot strict, not as much as in the states, but strict, you can no longer buy antibiotics, or some controlled substances without a prescription, its not like in the states where you basically need a prescription for an aspirin (im kidding of course), but its definitely not what it used to be. That being said, its by no means hard to get a prescription, or a fake prescription for that matter, I've never heard of anyone being trialed or going to jail for getting prescription drugs with a fake prescription.

-I vaguely recall lying on my back on a small stage while a stripper was dancing on my face... my friends thought it would be amusing to tie my shoelaces together. I figured out what they were doing down there so disappointed them by not falling, after the dance ended.

I don't know about TJ, but here in Mexico City, strip clups are basically banned now, the allegations were that girls were being sold and forced to basically work as prostitutes or strippers, but let me tell you, I knew a lot of strippers, many of them foreigners like Hungarian, Russian, Venezuelan, and such and besides doing the nasty stuff with them I used to engage in some serious conversations with them, many had children and loved what they did, the one from Venezuela had an economics degree but figured out she was making more money from stripping than from economics, so in my experience, no one was forced.

- My sales rep who was supposed to be driving me around was too wasted to drive, so I ended up driving us from San Diego to LAX on the 405 using the road reflectors to stay in my lane, driving by braille... remarkably I made my flight.

"driving by braile" hahahahahahahahha I laughed so hard, been there, done that.

Let me tell you something I definitely do not envy from the US, the DUI's, there is no DUIs in México, getting caught driving under the influence basically means one of the following things: "how much will you have to bribe the officer to let you go?" or how many "days, usually hours will you have to spend in jail before some one takes you out or bribes someone" the second option just means that you will have to pay more than the first option, but really no record will be left of your arrest (specially if you pay someone not to put in on record).  One time, I was very young and was pulled over by a patrol car, I was so drunk that I didn't even notice that I didnt have a tire, somehow I had a flat tire, but kept up going up to a point that there was no tire left, only the rim and I was making a ton of sparks in one of the biggest Mexico city avenues, not only should I have gone to jail for like a year, I could have been accused of "damages to the nation" and charged a substantial fine because my car was basically f**king up all the pavement with my sparking rims. I had to call and wake up my dad to come get me and "pay" the officer so he would let me go, my dad wasn't very happy after that, but I got out. Ahhh the wonders of the 3rd world.

There are some special circumstances in which you are in fact f**ked, for example there's been cases in which some guy was detained and forced to take an alcohol test, and when the police was going to take him to jail, he basically tried to escape, run over two police officers, killed one of them, and ended up crashing into a historical monument. So basically the lesson is this, as long as you do not end up on the news, you are probably fine....

There is a saying here in Mexico "everything can be solved with money", sad, but true... People who commit a crime and end up in prison is mostly because they are poor, of course, there are some exceptions, again, if you are on the news, less chances you'll get out, but even still, If you have enough money, you will get out no matter what.

You must have heard this one, there is a high rank military general from Mexico called "Salvador Cienfuegos" the US prosecuted him, extradited him, and was meant to be judged in a US court for drug traffic and a whole other stuff, I don't know what the mexican goverment made but basically convinced the US to return him back to Mexico so that he was judged over here, the international relations chancellor from mexico said in a public press conference televised in every channel "It would be suicide not to judge General Cienfuegos for what he did", two months later, all charges were dropped, Cienfuegos is free, never judged and the goverment never tried to explain the reasons why they let him go, they just covered it up with some BS, and no one ever mentioned his name again, what everyone thinks is that Cienfuegos must have known some dirty secrets from the goverment, so they just let him go, no question asked, no explanations necessary.

Another example is Lozoya, an ex goverment official, he was arrested somewere around the world, he got extradited to Mexico, and made a deal to reveal all the dirty secrets in exchange for immunity, he said things about the ex-president, pollitical officials, governors, high value CEOs, etc... it was a scandal, do you know how many of the people he revealed have been charged of anything? ZERO. Yeap, thats my country.

See, thats what makes the difference between developed and "developing" countries, most americans think we live with sombreros, sleeping under a cactus in a dirty town, that is a complete lie, we have a great economy, many scientists, a lot of very capable people, a lot of natural resources, we are the number one exporter of silver in the world, free education (the best universities here are free) a lot of manufacturing happens here, the thing is that we just have an extremely sh*tty goverment, and that makes the whole difference, the goverment is not only the president, it goes all the way down to every branch of goverment, you guys think you have a bad goverment, man you can sue the president in the us!, Monica Lewinsky did it and won!, Nixon was found guilty of corruption let say, and he resigned, man! that is impossible here, if Nixon would've been the president of Mexico he would just have to say "Yeah, so?", or like our current president likes to say to justify everything wrong "I have different data", "hey Mr. President but according to this goverment institution it says that you spent three times what you said you would spend in this project", his answer "that is a lie to undermine my goverment, I have different data", thats it! A pollitical trial like you did with Trump? that has NEVER and will NEVER happen here.

Let me tell you something funny, here in Mexico if you want to study a Master's degree or PhD (on anything but an MBA), the goverment will pay you, if you want to study abroad, they will also pay for your tuition, if you study here in Mexico the best universities are free but they will still pay you a monthly fee. Thats great right? I know it because I recieve goverment funding for studying my PhD in engineering. Well at first I thought this was something great, the goverment is investing on scientific research so they need doctors and such, so why are we not making most of our own technollogy? ahhhh here is the deal, the Mexican goverment realized its easier to give some PhD student some 700 USD a month rather than spending millions on research projects, that way you can say "We now have 5000 more PhDs than the year before" when in fact they should be saying "Now we have 5000 more UNEMPLOYED PhDs than the year before" because once you become a doctor, f**k you, you are on your own, its all about statistics. So where are the best Mexican scientists ? I'll tell you where NOT IN MEXICO, thats right, when I went to The Ohio State University for 6 months as a visiting scholar during my Master's degree I was offered to study my PhD over there, for many reasons I declined but I understood why most of the best minds in Mexico are not in Mexico.

I can give you many examples: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ra%C3%BAl_Rojas,
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manuel_Sandoval_Vallarta
https://ieeexplore.ieee.org/author/37269843200

The one in the second link was actually Richard Feynmann's mentor! and A colleague of the same University I attend and teach here in Mexico.

The classic Mexican dishes served at one private party were nothing like the Tex-Mex fast food that Americans ASSume is the extent of Mexican fare.

Amen to that!
 
it was a scandal, do you know how many of the people he revealed have been charged of anything? ZERO. Yeap, thats my country.

The US must also be a third world country.  Not one person put in jail over the financial crisis from 2008. 

Dual flip you make Mexico sound more like the old USA before woke vs Maga .  Not really sure we are moving forward ,  just sideways while Rome crumbles. 

I’ve been enjoying reading your threads. Laughing with you.
 
fazer said:
The US must also be a third world country.  Not one person put in jail over the financial crisis from 2008. 

Dual flip you make Mexico sound more like the old USA before woke vs Maga .  Not really sure we are moving forward ,  just sideways while Rome crumbles. 

I’ve been enjoying reading your threads. Laughing with you.

Thats funny that you mention that about the US, one would think that the US being the #1 economy and the  world strongest superpower it would also be the most developed country, I recently did a search for the top 10 most developed countries in the world, it was a surprise that the US is not in that list , oddly enough, China is! and most of the nordic countries are aswell, Norway being #1. https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/developed-countries it sure makes you wonder... this response from Norway to Will Ferrell's Superbowl ad is extremely funny: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mi3JQa1ynDw

I am glad you enjoy my posts
 
user 37518 said:
Thats funny that you mention that about the US, one would think that the US being the #1 economy and the  world strongest superpower it would also be the most developed country, I recently did a search for the top 10 most developed countries in the world, it was a surprise that the US is not in that list , oddly enough, China is! and most of the nordic countries are aswell, Norway being #1. https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/developed-countries it sure makes you wonder...

If the US sucks so bad, I guess we don't need to worry about securing our borders. :)

The only people wanting to break into china are coming from N. Korea, because it's worse.

JR 

PS; I love those lists, they constantly remind me how bad MS sux.... ;-(
 
JohnRoberts said:
If the US sucks so bad, I guess we don't need to worry about securing our borders. :)

The only people wanting to break into china are coming from N. Korea, because it's worse.

JR 

PS; I love those lists, they constantly remind me how bad MS sux.... ;-(

Take it easy John, no one ever said that, that list is based on statistics like age expectancy, general income, and many other things, for example student debt, you dont pay for education in Norway, you get more points for that than the US, simple as that, no one said the US sucks.
 
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