know any jokes?

[scott2000]

My son asked me
"Where does poo come from?"
I was a little uncomfortable but gave him an honest explanation.
He looked a little perplexed, and stared at me in stunned silence for a few seconds and asked,
"And Tigger?"

 

[pucho812]

Did you know that on the Canary Islands there is not one canary. The same goes for the Virgin Islands, not one canary.

 

[pucho812]

Taylor swift has written 100 songs about breaking up but has written zero songs about making her man a sandwich and serving it with a beer.
Coincidence?

I think not.

 

[pucho812]

Ordered a book online about how to scam people.
It’s been months and it hasn’t arrived.

 

[pucho812]

A couple of women are out having drinks and comparing husbands.
They get on the topic of love making and one lady boast that her and her husband make love for over an hour.
The other lady says that’s nothing my husband and I can easily do three hours.
Impressed the lady asks how is it your husband and you go three hours?
The lady responds well, we do roll
Play. The other night he was the doctor and I was his patient.
He had me in the waiting room for 2 hours and 58 minutes.

 

[pucho812]

My friends Italian import car got hit by hail over the weekend. Now it’s al dente.

 

[pucho812]

Lol

 

[Rob Flinn]

Did you hear about the guy who had "Gucci" tattood on his scrotum so he could give his wife a designer bag ?

 

[Rob Flinn]

 

[Rob Flinn]

Breaking news , a man who took an Airline company to court after his luggage went missing has lost his case.

 

[john12ax7]

Taylor swift has written 100 songs about breaking up but has written zero songs about making her man a sandwich and serving it with a beer.
Coincidence?

I think not.

Made me think of this

 

[Rob Flinn]

I tried to work as an historian for years, but I found there was no future in it.

 

[pucho812]

There was a period where I lost my job and I couldn’t pay the electricity bill. Those were the darkest days of my life.

 

[pucho812]

A man comes home with a duck under his arm. He says this is the pig I have been having intercourse with.
His wife screams at him and says “that’s not a pig”
He yells back I wasn’t talking to you.

 

[Rob Flinn]

A dyslexic yorkshire man was walking down the street the other day wearing a Cat-Flap.

 

[ruffrecords]

A dyslexic yorkshire man was walking down the street the other day wearing a Cat-Flap.

LOL, nice one.

Cheers

Ian

 

[pucho812]

LOL, nice one.

Cheers

Ian

I laughed too but I didn’t understand it.

 

[Ó Draighnáin]

Yorkshire flat cap...

 

[pucho812]

Yorkshire flat cap...

Oh because they are lysdexic. I think my issue here was I didn’t know a Yorkshire flat cap. Now that I looked it up I see it’s an English driving cap.

 

[ruffrecords]

I laughed too but I didn’t understand it.

Archetypal Yorkshire men wear flat caps on their heads.

Cheers

Ian